Visa Experience Part 3

The time was 7:10 AM on 22-06-2009, and I was well ahead of the reporting time of 7:30 AM. Just as I was about to think it was just me, I realised there were 4 other people around me who had come early too. Here I wish to bring about a most peculiar aspect of human beings- In professional surroundings, they tend to have a conversation revolving totally around the current atmosphere and it’s immaterial that they don’t even know each other’s names. Similar was the case here and in the entire time I spent with these people, I can claim only to know the name of 1 and that too because I happened to glance at his Visa interview appointment letter: Jason Jesse James (JJJ, that’s a killer name!) from Kerala who happened to have an MS admit from Georgia Tech. The other 2 guys were from Chennai and were going to University of Illinois for an MS course. The gal behind me was going to Rice (I certainly had my share of lady company during this trip) for an MS course and it was obvious I talked to her more due to the fact that we had the same destination in the US of A.

At 7:20, we were allowed a free pass ahead of the crowd by a security guard with a most astounding moustache- The thing seemed to cover half his face! Thick tamil accent not withstanding, he had all of us hand over the passport and appointment letter to him through a window sill and then returned them all to us. The gate opened and for some reason images of Fox River Penitentiary (Prison Break FTW) came to my mind with the appropriate music. A series of security checks followed and the guys were separated from the gals for obvious reasons. Now I wont pretend I liked this, but I turned out to have a great time with Jason and the other guys for the entire 1.5 hours that I was inside. The guards inside suddenly seemed to have a much calmer demeanour and a voice that would put Baba Amte to shame despite being more Madraasi than Rajnikanth himself! Security checks over, we walked through a very heavy metal door into air-conditioning- Oh thank God for that…

Yes, someone actually made this image for the internet!

There seemed to be people of all possible regions of India here and I don’t envy the coordinators who had to handle them all. Mind you, we were still in the Indian section and sadly it was unanimous among the 4 of us that the Indian inspectors were clearly ruder than their American counterparts L…One of them was a grumpy old man (GOM; Nothing to do with the media player) saw me as he attempted to rectify my documents and in the midst of it asked me to write my name in Konkani on one of the forms despite it being clearly written that Konkani had no written script. Then the doofus asked me to write it in tulu, kannada and Hindi in that order. Finally his role was done with and I was asked to take a well marked path to another building where the US consulate-general along with his people worked. Here was where the actual visa interview would be:-

Inside, after crossing multiple security checks and those heavy doors, was a huge hall divided into 2 sections: One for the dependents of those coming along with the primary applicant and another for student/exchange visitors. All 4 of us, who were still together, took a gamble and sat at the far left of the waiting hall- Now this was mainly because the LCD TV set hanging directly above us was showing highlights of the ICC T20 world cup final but there were very few people here and the majority were in the right hand section of the hall. A lot of talking ensued which mostly revolved around the application process, including one of us who was forced to give his TOEFL in a Reliance webworld with 35 people all talking at the same time and another who had pressed Cancel on his GRE score window by mistake when he was confident of securing a 1600!

The visa interview counters soon opened and there were 3 people available: Another grumpy old man (GOM), a sweet matron lady and a unanimously declared hot latin chick (HLC). GOM & HLC seemed to handle the students and in the 20 minutes we waited, GOM interviewed just 5 students and rejected 3 of them with 1 girl bursting into tears right there at the counter while HLC accepted 8 of the 11 applicants at her counter with a smile: It was clear where we wanted to go but ultimately it was not our choice. However sitting in the far left paid off big time as we were asked to stand in the snake-way very soon. When I was the next to go to an available counter, the person in front went to HLC and I was cursing my luck. Luckily GOM decided to be extra special in his own way with the guy he was interviewing and by the time he was done, all 4 of us were finished with HLC…

HLC: What are you going to do at Rice?

Me: Pursue my Doctoral Studies, Madam

HLC: In which field?

Me: Inorganic catalysis (Quite clever if I do say so myself, its probably the most harmless chemical topic there is)

HLC: What’s that?

Me (With my mastery of peshaab): Study the effect of imbedding metals and metal compounds into carbon or silicon based catalysts to get a higher surface area-to-volume ratio (For the 3 people in the world who know my fascination with the “surface area to volume” term, it’s now less… A lot less!)

HLC: Uhmm… Ok! What are your parents?

Me (Highly tempted to reply Homo sapiens): My father is a banker with Bank of Baroda, and my mother is a home-maker

HLC: And how are you sponsoring your studies at Rice?

Me: I have a full fellowship from Rice University

HLC (Gives a hard look which for some reason got the other guys there jealous J): Ok study well at Rice

Me: Thank you, Madam!

And that was it: Less than 30 secs for a process spanning 2 weeks of work and a further 2 weeks of waiting! Coming out the fortress took a mere 15 secs owing to no checks or obstacles, there was another door there and voila- I was out at the gate! Waited a little for the other 3 guys, shook hands while congratulating each other and we went our separate ways…

The train journey back was routine and I am thankful for that- I didn’t think I wanted anymore to do with loud girls/babies. I bought 2 novels and 10 DVD’s from a seedy looking guy (Aren’t they all seedy??) and at 10 AM, 23-06-2009 I was back home. I got my passport soon afterwards and that was the end of the Visa experience, for now atleast…

Visa Experience Part 2

This post is dedicated mainly to Yuvi-Macha and Prabha-Kutty who tried their best over the last 4 years to convince us of the beauty of Chennai: Ya right! Anyway…

As the train ceased its motion finally, I realised why they say you can tell Chennai is not far off from the smell! But to be fair the stench emanating from most central stations is not that of Aphrodite in her hall of flowers. I got down:

and without questioning why, just followed the masses to the main entrance hall: It was my first impression of Chennai proper in over 10 years and to say it was chaotic would be an understatement. The human scent was everywhere and sounds of “Thambi!” and “Macha!” showed the brotherhood of the common Madraasi.

Getting off the station, I crossed the road and a heat wave hit me full on! Mind you that I had just spent over 18 hours at 20⁰ C but it was 3 PM and the temperature must have been atleast 40⁰ C. Alas that it was much later I learnt the secret of survival here: You need to keep moving- If you stick in one place then you will melt, but the relatively less humidity (wrt Mangalore) keeps away the heat upon constant movement.

The rickshaw guys didn’t help make things better for this poor visitor as they asked for anything between Rs 150 to Rs 400 (No, I am not joking!) for a 7 Km journey. About 30 mins (and over 500 buses later), I got the proper bus and it charged me Rs 3.50 (Lol) for the very journey!

The roads in Chennai are bifurcated, and each bifurcation is then bifurcated too in the sense that it’s a 2 lane road made into 2 mini lanes each for up-down movement. The city par-se is actually clean but then the open drains next to nearly every bus stop doesn’t help raise the city’s prestige in the alien’s eyes.

My destination was a cool little lodge with air-conditioning (The only thing I cared about!) and settled down soon in front of the TV to watch the women’s ICC T20 world cup finale.

In the late evening my dad decided to go out “for a walk” or so he told me and asked me to join him. Too late I realised it was just an excuse to visit Saravana Selvarathnam: The Shopping Mall FROM HELL!!! Over 6 stories of garments and nothing else stood in front of me and everywhere there seemed to be a picture of a ridiculously happy (and ugly) man who probably owned the whole thing… Did I ever mention I hate shopping for ordinary stuff like clothes? Take me to Chor Bazaar and you will find it near impossible to drag me out but this can go to the Birds!!

Things were looking routine until I developed a case of loose motion - That Chicken Biriyani was a little bit too funny I guess! Now this is probably the worst thing that could have happened to me given that the consulate people look for any sign of weakness you present there, but luckily I healed in time with the help of medication. The next day saw me in formals and carrying a file looking like an IT coolie, took an auto and got down in front of the VFS centre because the auto driver thought it was the US Consulate. Luckily the consulate was only a minute of walking away and I turned the corner, only to see a mass of humanity- trying their best to be part of the Indian exodus into the US of A. This place is a white fortress and there seemed to be people everywhere…

Tetris with Lyrics

Courtesy of You-tube and a certain Malaysian friend, this video is one of the funniest I have ever heard. For the benefit of, well, everyone I got the lyrics below: Hear it and tell me you didnt like it- I dare you! It has 18+ wording content though...

One, two, one two three four
Shapes made of four colored blocks like a T or a box
Come down like falling bricks
You can place them in rows, but everybody knows
That they made this game for chicks (HEY!)

Mom just loves to flip and stack
Grandma says this shit is like crack! (Well it is!)

This is the game girls deserve, there is no learning curve
Which makes it great for noobs
It will fill you with glee, especially if you have a vaj and boobs (HEY!)

Your mom loves it
Mine does too
Call me sexist, bitch it's still true (just kidding about the bitch part)

Deep in a girl's dainty brain, there's a spot near a vein
Which regulates their bliss (The T-spot)
Once they see falling blocks, the T-spot unlocks
And they start to sing like this (SING!)

LA LA LA LA LA LA LA
WE LOVE TETRIS, LA LA LA LA

Here is a trick I have learned
To avoid getting burned
When you piss off your chick

If you sing this on key,
Immediately she'll forget that you're a dick (Try it!)

LA LA LA LA (I'm still mad.) LA LA LA (Is that the Tetris song?)
LA LA LA LA (I love tetris!) LA LA LA (Im happy now.)

Tetris helps when chicks want to neuter us (Snip, snip, snip)
If you love it, you probably have a uterus!

The misadventures of last night's get-together

When a friend of 16 years, Darshan, revealed he was all set to join Indian Oil Corporation Ltd (IOCL) in New Delhi from the 28th of June I knew it was the end of what I believed to be an extended run at closure from NITK for a lot of my classmates: 5 dayscholars, 1 in college till July and a few who keep visiting made it feel like college never ended-Yet!

Enter Preet Joseph Joy who after spending what seemed like an eternity at Sreekumar Sir's farm at Karkala was beginning to look a lot like him:-

Preet normally

Preet Now

He was returning to college to bid farewell to the faculty and it seemed perfect that I had returned from Chennai an hour ago! Plans were made to meet for dinner at Chef's, Kadri for 7 pm and all around promised to be there. The weather was great and sunny and I made the huge mistake of not taking along an umbrella which, as it turned out, made this evening unforgettable even before we met at all...

I have a confession to make- I am ridiculously punctual; to the point where I arrive 15-20 mins earlier than the expected time even though I am fully aware others arrive 15-20 mins later. Similar was the case yesterday when I arrived at Chef's at 6:45 pm where the others (The earliest group atleast) was a good 40 mins behind. The weather was still breezy and clear so I decided to go "exploring" and went along a side road which I had not before traversed. Seeing that I had atleast 30 mins on me, I kept walking till I realised I was about 4 Km away now and night was falling quickly. All this was no problem until the first drops of rain started coming down on me, and I turned back only to spot a sideroad which "could" be a short-cut...

I have another confession to make- Even when I know the direct path will surely lead me to my destination, I will take chances on possible shortcuts to the destination if only to get it into my memory bank of maps and routes! Similar was the case yesterday and I took a road which led me to a small tea-shop by the side of the road when the heavens poured down- literally!

The rain was so bad that when I decided to chance it, I had to scurry back running and the "gud-angadi" man gave me a cup of his finest coffee for free (I had offered to pay!) and maybe due to the given circumstances it was the most delicious coffee I can remember having. The rain stopped briefly and I hurried back. I was but 200 metres away when rain struck again and this time I had to make do under a few banana leaves near the edge of a 50 foot fall off the road

straight onto the roof of a shop and so I waited, getting soaking wet nonetheless. In about 15 mins (the time was 7:25 pm) I was able to reach Chef's where the doorman had second thoughts about letting me in unless I dried myseld off!

Anyway everyone soon arrived and the party was great, especially knowing that I was probably seeing most of them (Preet, Manoj, Kiran) for the last time and the rest had few days left themselves- Suddenly August was not that far off!

Sanjay & Darshan

Manoj, Preet & Kiran

Manoj, Kiran, Me (via Mirror), Sanjay, Darshan, Shiva and Preet

Shiva, Me, Darshan & Sanjay

Great evening, capped by the memories! Thanks guys..

Visa Experience Part 1

“Just look into the eyes of the person, be confident and don’t be nervous!”

Such words and others (Many, many others) were the cause of tension for me the last week as I attempted to get my Visa for the doctoral studies I would soon pursue at Rice University. Of course I was as cool as cucumber till news came of Sameer Rao getting his name on the Visa wait-list and not the instant approval: Despite the external differences, both him and I are smooth talkers- Our mouths are probably our greatest strengths and in this case our greatest weakness.. Talking incessantly was not good here- not good at all…

Forgive me for making this sound like something out of a suspense novel! I can’t help write such for my mind thinks in a way that makes even the most routine of jobs seem equivalent to building a skyscraper all the way to the moon... But before I get ahead of myself I need to go back in time: Back to Thursday, 18-06-2009 and the time was 5:25 am. I was talking to my senior at Rice, Sravani, who told me all it took was the I-20 form which said I was funding myself through a fellowship and the Visa would be mine. Well Sam had a superb GATech admit with a full fellowship too, and as far as sensitive topics go- Nothing is more sensitive than a Chemical Engineer attempting to study Nanobiotechnology (Read Michael Crichton’s Prey for more).

I took advice from many corners, some human, others from the internet. But there I was at 9:30 pm on Saturday, 20-06-2009 sitting in my train seat waiting for the train to depart from Mangalore Central railway station on its way to Chennai Central. Within 5 minutes though, everything changed…

No- Robbers did not attempt a burglary, there was no terrorist attack and neither was a couple fighting through its marriage with the bride attempting to jump off the moving train (The one who this happened to, knows it and I need not mention the name here!) but something far more uncomfortable for me, atleast for now. I had seat 30 in the AC 3 Tier coach and the 5 closest seats to mine got occupied by a group of college girls who I soon learnt were on their way to Salem for a trip. Now those who know me will have giggles by now and as I attempted to make light humour of this situation by informing some friends, the responses ranged from “Oh ya great dud… very lucky… Introduce ur self to them and give ma number ok…… ;-)” and “Oh wow.. J why don’t such things happen to me man… L” to “How fortunate you must b! Take advantage of the situation, my dear friend 4 such golden opportunities rarely knock twice. ;-) lol. Enjoy.” The only “enjoyment” I had for an hour or so in the beginning was listening to some splendid, and utterly nonsensical, express Malayalam with the words “Kankanadi” and “Parotha-Meen” coming in nearly every sentence for some reason..

People fail to realise I have already had my share of good luck for the entire summer and it was bound to run out. So it indeed did: I wake up in the morning to find them replaced by a family with not 1 but 2 wailing kids! Ok so maybe I woke up a lil late given that I slept a lil late (Ahem!) but nothing was to stop the infants that day… I was willing to tolerate it if it weren’t for the adults accompanying them who seemed to have a penchant for making conversation with the babies…

I ask you- Why is it that a perfectly functioning human adult lowers his/her IQ by a 100 points when in front of a cute (And awake) baby? The multiple sounds of “Gilli, gilli” and “Baa baa” resonated throughout the compartment for the better part of the morning and retiring to my top berth was no help as they put on the fan at high speed (I was right underneath the AC shaft). Lunch soon arrived and the Chicken Biriyani tasted a bit funny- little was I to know that it was not going to be funny for long…

The time was 2:50 pm on Sunday, 21-06-2009 and the ingeniously placed announcement board in the compartment announced Chennai central was a minute away. I gathered my luggage and got down, following the crowd into Chennai- A place I haven’t been to in over 7 years and all the times it has been mentioned, it has been with a shudder: People do NOT want to go there, and I was about to find out exactly why…

Rice ID

Rice University finally sent me my official email id: Varun.Shenoy.Gangoli@Rice.edu or Vg4@Rice.edu

But what made that letter funny was that it was addressed to Varun Shenoy in Iran and they actually sent it to Iran before figuring out that Karnataka is in India! I was lucky those Iranians didnt confiscate the document as a state secret but hey- How many people get a letter that has Iran scratched and India written in a child's hand writing with apologies on the cover??

Pseudomonas fulva????

The National Centre for Cellular Sciences (NCCS), Pune finally released the genotypic identification results of my bacteria 2 days ago and to say it was surprising would be an understatement! While all of us were expecting it to belong to the genus Lampropedia (Which was my find from the huge Bacteriology manual btw), the result gave it a 99% match to Pseudomonas fulva- A pretty new species given that no one around had any clue about it. For those who are interested, here is the genetic composition of the bacterium:-

GCGGTCACTTAATCGCGTTAGCTGCGCCACTAAAATCTCAAGGATTCCAACGGCTAG

TTGACATCGTTTACGGCGTGGACTACCAGGGTATCTAATCCTGTTTGCTCCCCACGC

TTTCGCACCTCAGTGTCAGTATCAGTCCAGGTGGTCGCCTTCGCCACTGGTGTTCCT

TCCTATATCTACGCATTTCACCGCTACACAGGAAATTCCACCACCCTCTACCGTACTC

TAGCTTGCCAGTTTTGGATGCAGTTCCCAGGTTGAGCCCGGGGCTTTCACATCCAA

CTTAACAAACCACCTACGCGCGCTTTACGCCCAGTAATTCCGATTAACGCTTGCACC

CTCTGTATTACCGCGGCTGCTGGCACAGAGTTAGCCGGTGCTTATTCTGTCGGTAA

CGTCAAAATTGCAAAGTATTAATCTACAGCCCTTCCTCCCAACTTAAAGTGCTTTAC

AATCCGAAGACCTTCTTCACACACGCGGCATGGCTGGATCAGGCTTTCGCCCATTG

TCCAATATTCCCCACTGCTGCCTCCCGTAGGAGTCTGGACCGTGTCTCAGTTCCAGT

GTGACTGATCATCCTCTCAGACCAGTTACGGATCGTCGCCTTGGTGAGCCATTACC

TCACCAACTAGCTAATCCGACCTAGGCTCATCTGATAGCGCAAGGCCCGAAGGTCC

CCTGCTTTCTCCCGTAGGACGTATGCGGTATTAGCGTTCCTTTCGAAACGTTGTCC

CCCACTACCAGGCAGATTCCTAGGCATTACTCACCCGTCCGCCGCTGAATCAAGGAG

CAAGCTCCCGTCATCCGCTCGACTTGCATGTGTTAGCCTGCCGCCAGCGTCAATCTG

Even mightygoogle has no useful info on this but I suppose its clear now that I got pics to compare:-

Pseudomonas literature Picture

My bacterium observed under Microscope

While that may sound gibberish, it was big enough to warrant an application to present this work at the National Conference on Biotechnology to be held on 1^st and 2^nd of July this year in Hyderabad. More on that if selected to appear!